I loved this piece! It's a wonderful reminder to us that we can make a difference through our encouragement and belief in others. We can pass it on, and the ripples continue outward farther than our eyes can see. I was reminded of something I wrote a few years ago, which I'll paste here:
Pivotal People
Something I read challenged me to reflect on my past, specifically those who encouraged me along life's journey, helping me become who I am today. So, as I considered who were the encouragers in my life, several names popped into my head immediately. These first names to come to mind were some I considered the sweetest and maybe, therefore, the most obvious. You know the type, those genuinely sweet people who fill their talk with “honey, precious, baby” and so on. They were gifted with giving pats on the back and compliments, and who doesn't love those?! These folks stood out in the skies of my life like rainbows. Some were family members, some were teachers, some were church members, and (later) some were friends or co-workers.
But as I continued to reflect, I realized I could trace a big shot of much needed confidence, well timed in my junior high years, to a teacher whose name was not one of those first ones to pop into my head. Although we all love teachers who draw red smiley face 100's at the tops of our papers with sweet “Great Job!” notes, this person wasn't that type. No, I remember CleiJo Walker as more the all-business, hands-on-her-hips type. And she didn't even teach a class that you'd expect to make much of a life impact … she was my typing teacher. That was around 1980, and the room was filled not with laptops and keyboards but with manual typewriters. Oh, the sound of carriage returns and bells signaling the end of timed writings! Maybe it was because I took piano lessons that my fingers were nimble … or maybe it was in my genes, as my mom had won typing awards when she was in high school, but typing was easy for me. Junior high was not.
A late bloomer, this awkward stage in my life may be illustrated by the time I was called, “son” by our principal. A teacher asked me to drop some papers by his office. When I walked in (with my fine haired attempt at the coveted Dorothy Hamill haircut), he looked up from behind his desk over the top of thick black glasses, and began some question with, “Son, ...” I am sure I sighed and slumped my shoulders as I left his office. Yes, the halls of that school seemed filled with more socially and physically developed young teens than I was. But back to typing class, where I was very comfortable ... Mrs. Walker no doubt noticed how quickly I finished assignments and started doodling to keep from being bored. So one day she asked me to come with her to the main office. She said she needed someone to draw that year's cover for either the school paper or the yearbook, I can't remember which. I just remember carefully drawing the school mascot, a gator, surrounded by stars and the year, on carbon paper. That may not sound profound, but self confidence began to emerge … all because she believed in me, then put me to work.
Mrs. Walker then tasked me with projects related to the school paper, which I believe was called the North Star. The sense of accomplishment I began feeling was pivotal in my life, I now realize. Philosopher Thomas Carlyle hit the nail on the head when he said, “Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.” Mrs. Walker noticed my untapped potential and quietly provided an opportunity to put it to use. She did what any good teacher should do: act as a catalyst in their students' lives, giving them the chance to accomplish, and thus laying bricks on their pathways to success.
I write this not only to thank CleiJo Walker and so many others who believed in me, but also to remind us each of the power of noticing someone's abilities … then doing what we can to encourage or “bring to light” those abilities. It's a wise exercise to reflect over our lives, noting those who made a difference, noting how they did that, and then asking ourselves how we can do that for others. We don't have to be teachers to be catalysts. “Pivotal” is defined, “as of crucial importance in relation to the development or success of something else.” If we could each do our part to look at others with a focus on their potential, our world might just begin to look a little more like heaven. Pivotal people: may we know them … may we be them.
Being social animals, we have to care about others, about what they think, they remember or do to us. They can make us feel either encouraged or discouraged or simply ignored.
However, what will happen to us in relation to others will depend entirely on our three important qualities. They are our self-esteem, self-confidence, and willpower. If we have strong willpower, nothing should discourage us, even when we are ignored. Strong willpower itself can be the source of our encouragement.
When it comes to interrelationships with others, encouragement requires recognition, appreciation, and approval of efforts, not necessarily the endorsement of results. One may feel encouraged even when failures are appreciated. Encouragement also requires importance and trust, like an invitation to be involved.
A word of recognition and of appreciation, spoken or written, was always encouraging, but involving me made me trustworthy, which went beyond recognition, appreciation, and approval. Once trust was reposed in me, I was not only encouraged, I could never forget the people who trusted me. This was simply because how they made me feel; important and trustworthy. They boosted my self-confidence and enhanced my belief in me. I felt encouraged every time I was appreciated irrespective of my success or failures, be it from my parents or my peers. I felt encouraged every time I was given importance, a recognition of my identity and my status.
To encourage people, in addition to recognition, appreciation, and approval, I can make them feel important and trustworthy by involving them in team, entrusting them with tasks and assignments. I can boost their self-confidence and willpower. Above all, I can ensure that, by trusting them, they trust in me in return. This is what I would like to see and to do, to establish mutual trust, creating an unforgettable bond between us, be they members of family, friends, or colleague of the team.
Encouragements with praise and prizes are important. But encouragement by establishing mutual trust is unforgettable.
With self-confidence and willpower, we can; with mutual trust and encouragement, we will.
I loved this piece! It's a wonderful reminder to us that we can make a difference through our encouragement and belief in others. We can pass it on, and the ripples continue outward farther than our eyes can see. I was reminded of something I wrote a few years ago, which I'll paste here:
Pivotal People
Something I read challenged me to reflect on my past, specifically those who encouraged me along life's journey, helping me become who I am today. So, as I considered who were the encouragers in my life, several names popped into my head immediately. These first names to come to mind were some I considered the sweetest and maybe, therefore, the most obvious. You know the type, those genuinely sweet people who fill their talk with “honey, precious, baby” and so on. They were gifted with giving pats on the back and compliments, and who doesn't love those?! These folks stood out in the skies of my life like rainbows. Some were family members, some were teachers, some were church members, and (later) some were friends or co-workers.
But as I continued to reflect, I realized I could trace a big shot of much needed confidence, well timed in my junior high years, to a teacher whose name was not one of those first ones to pop into my head. Although we all love teachers who draw red smiley face 100's at the tops of our papers with sweet “Great Job!” notes, this person wasn't that type. No, I remember CleiJo Walker as more the all-business, hands-on-her-hips type. And she didn't even teach a class that you'd expect to make much of a life impact … she was my typing teacher. That was around 1980, and the room was filled not with laptops and keyboards but with manual typewriters. Oh, the sound of carriage returns and bells signaling the end of timed writings! Maybe it was because I took piano lessons that my fingers were nimble … or maybe it was in my genes, as my mom had won typing awards when she was in high school, but typing was easy for me. Junior high was not.
A late bloomer, this awkward stage in my life may be illustrated by the time I was called, “son” by our principal. A teacher asked me to drop some papers by his office. When I walked in (with my fine haired attempt at the coveted Dorothy Hamill haircut), he looked up from behind his desk over the top of thick black glasses, and began some question with, “Son, ...” I am sure I sighed and slumped my shoulders as I left his office. Yes, the halls of that school seemed filled with more socially and physically developed young teens than I was. But back to typing class, where I was very comfortable ... Mrs. Walker no doubt noticed how quickly I finished assignments and started doodling to keep from being bored. So one day she asked me to come with her to the main office. She said she needed someone to draw that year's cover for either the school paper or the yearbook, I can't remember which. I just remember carefully drawing the school mascot, a gator, surrounded by stars and the year, on carbon paper. That may not sound profound, but self confidence began to emerge … all because she believed in me, then put me to work.
Mrs. Walker then tasked me with projects related to the school paper, which I believe was called the North Star. The sense of accomplishment I began feeling was pivotal in my life, I now realize. Philosopher Thomas Carlyle hit the nail on the head when he said, “Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.” Mrs. Walker noticed my untapped potential and quietly provided an opportunity to put it to use. She did what any good teacher should do: act as a catalyst in their students' lives, giving them the chance to accomplish, and thus laying bricks on their pathways to success.
I write this not only to thank CleiJo Walker and so many others who believed in me, but also to remind us each of the power of noticing someone's abilities … then doing what we can to encourage or “bring to light” those abilities. It's a wise exercise to reflect over our lives, noting those who made a difference, noting how they did that, and then asking ourselves how we can do that for others. We don't have to be teachers to be catalysts. “Pivotal” is defined, “as of crucial importance in relation to the development or success of something else.” If we could each do our part to look at others with a focus on their potential, our world might just begin to look a little more like heaven. Pivotal people: may we know them … may we be them.
Being social animals, we have to care about others, about what they think, they remember or do to us. They can make us feel either encouraged or discouraged or simply ignored.
However, what will happen to us in relation to others will depend entirely on our three important qualities. They are our self-esteem, self-confidence, and willpower. If we have strong willpower, nothing should discourage us, even when we are ignored. Strong willpower itself can be the source of our encouragement.
When it comes to interrelationships with others, encouragement requires recognition, appreciation, and approval of efforts, not necessarily the endorsement of results. One may feel encouraged even when failures are appreciated. Encouragement also requires importance and trust, like an invitation to be involved.
A word of recognition and of appreciation, spoken or written, was always encouraging, but involving me made me trustworthy, which went beyond recognition, appreciation, and approval. Once trust was reposed in me, I was not only encouraged, I could never forget the people who trusted me. This was simply because how they made me feel; important and trustworthy. They boosted my self-confidence and enhanced my belief in me. I felt encouraged every time I was appreciated irrespective of my success or failures, be it from my parents or my peers. I felt encouraged every time I was given importance, a recognition of my identity and my status.
To encourage people, in addition to recognition, appreciation, and approval, I can make them feel important and trustworthy by involving them in team, entrusting them with tasks and assignments. I can boost their self-confidence and willpower. Above all, I can ensure that, by trusting them, they trust in me in return. This is what I would like to see and to do, to establish mutual trust, creating an unforgettable bond between us, be they members of family, friends, or colleague of the team.
Encouragements with praise and prizes are important. But encouragement by establishing mutual trust is unforgettable.
With self-confidence and willpower, we can; with mutual trust and encouragement, we will.
Thank you for writing this so eloquently. The feeling of desperation and uncertainty, my heart is very heavy these days.